In anticipation of their upcoming Peace Circle series, Shirley Lynn and Karen in their blogs the last couple of weeks have talked about what ‘Circle’ is and how it works.

As I have thought about this and considered how Circle has impacted my life, I realized there are many places where we gather in groups – whether in circles or other formations. I too recalled numerous  occasions of being gathered around a campfire, or around a kitchen table or at a family reunion – times and places where stories, ideas, joys and sorrows were shared. At times, this sharing was met laughter and joviality, and other times it was met with argument, judgement, or misunderstanding.

When I reflect on those experiences of Circle, I can recall times of feeling let down and unheard by those I made myself vulnerable to. I also recall times of tremendous support and caring, even from those I didn’t anticipate or expect it.

So what makes Peace Circles different from my other experiences of ‘circles’?

• Everyone is presumed to be equal – no one is above or below anyone else. The facilitators are there merely to guide the process but have no greater role than anyone else.
• A talking piece is passed around the circle. Whoever has it talks, and everyone else listens (without interruption of any kind). This empowers the speaker to honestly share their truth, experiences and feelings
• Feeling safe is paramount – physically, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. Creating an environment of trust means each person can share their truth and heart.
• Confidentiality is expected and agreed upon. What is said in the Circle stays in the Circle.
• Participants bear witness to and support each other’s growth, healing and transformation, both as individuals and as a whole.

I think it is a real (and too rare) gift to be part of a group of truly caring and supportive individuals. A place where you can bring to light old wounds, beliefs and stories – to have them listened to and honoured as a part of who you are – and then to release them. A place where you can explore and embrace ideas and beliefs and have others who genuinely encourage and support you. A place where you can share in the joy of someone else’s healing and transformation. A place where Peace is abundant and gracious.

I invite you to reflect on how you have experienced ‘circle’. And then consider how those events might have been different within the context of a Peace Circle.

If you want to experience a Peace Circle, Shirley Lynn Martin and Karen McCarthy are facilitating a 4-Part Series called Opening to Grace: Connection, Acceptance and Wealth of Love starting Tuesday, September 10th. There are still a few spaces available and we’d love to see you there. For more details, visit Opening to Grace: Connection, Acceptance and Wealth of Love.

Submitted by Lucy Martin

 

I have always loved circles. As a kid my school notebooks were full of them as I doodled to pass the time. Actually, I still find myself drawing them when my mind wants a break and drifts from the task at hand. My fascination with circles has been with me for as long as I can remember.

When I first started going on canoeing adventures, I couldn’t wait until that time of the evening when dusk fell upon us and we started to build our fire. Staring into those flames as we gathered around the fire was magic for me. I had this feeling of being connected to everyone and everything. My body could breathe deeper and I felt myself soften and open in new and wonderful ways. We had some of our most meaningful conversations sitting in circle around those fires. We settled more deeply into ourselves and opened more fully to each other as we shared the truth of our experiences.

Over a year ago I was introduced to the concept of “Peace Circles”. A friend had taken Peace Circle training and shared a book about it with me. As she shared her experience with me, I had this incredibly strong sense that this is what I was meant to do. The Peace Circle concepts and process resonated so deeply with me that it took about a nanosecond to decide to take peace circle training. It is one of those experiences where my knowing was screaming “yes” and the practical pragmatic part of me was left sorting out how to make it happen.

My experience with Peace Circles has been truly transformative for me. It has given me a way to be in community and in a safe and honouring way, share and connect authentically at a much deeper level. With this deeper level of connection and authenticity I have found great opportunities for growth and healing in my life.

When we gather in circle we tap into this ancient and sacred knowing that exists in all of us. The knowing that as we sit around the fire our voices can be equally shared and valued and that when we come grounded in our true selves with shared intention and values we tap into our sacred and collective wisdom and what happens is so much more than we could have imagined alone.

I know this may sound revolutionary but I really do believe Peace Circles could change the world and I invite you to experience the magic. This September, Shirley Lynn and I are facilitating a 4-Part Peace Circle series. I am so excited about this series and the connection and shared wisdom that we will experience. Check it out.

Submitted by Karen McCarthy

In my late teens, our congregational youth pastor organized a series of floor hockey games with Native inmates at a nearby minimum security prison. The experience of getting our names police-checked, our selves searched each time we went to the prison, and the steel gates clanging locked behind each of us as we walked single file through the hallway was both exciting and scary for me. I loved playing sports and playing floor hockey on a Sunday morning with a group of Native men was about the best church I could have imagined. The second part of the morning involved our youth group being invited to participate in their Native ceremony – in circle – in which I was also excited to participate. Circle had always made sense to me, even though I had little exposure to its power at the time.

After the fun, the laughter, the competition and the thrill of jostling about with hockey sticks and balls, we gathered into circle and prepared for the smudging. Although I didn’t understand the language of prayers to Great Spirit, I felt the presence of Mystery and Divine Love as I always do in the invocation of that which is Sacred – prison or no prison!

An Elder led the prayers, the smudging, drummed and smoked the sacred pipe in which we all got to participate. I remember feeling how wonderful this ceremony felt. I am now very grateful for what our youth pastor was encouraging and had worked so hard to make happen. He wanted us to experience the culture and the spirituality of those who walked upon this land connected to Creator in very different ways than we were practising. I appreciated that there was no attempt on our part to change or bring any of our spiritual ceremony to them. As Ghandi states: “Like the bee gathering honey from different flowers, the wise person accepts the essence of different scriptures and sees only the good in religions.” We were there to be blessed by their ceremony and rituals for invoking the presence and power of Great Spirit.

I look back at this experience with great awe at how it has shaped my understanding of who we are as human beings. Never in that circle was I fearful of any of these inmates.  Never in that circle did I think that I was superior to them, nor them to me. I didn’t see anyone as more or less than anyone else. Our dignity was equal. We were all equi-distant to the centre. Each of us – no exceptions!

Our stories were also equal in value and no story was excluded. The circle I realized, had the power to contain all our stories, regardless of who told it. I was deeply moved and relieved that in this Circle, all our names for the Divine were equal and with their own dignity. No name, no tradition, no doctrine was more or less than another. I am so grateful for these memories and the wisdom shared with me in these circles in the prison.

This month we will explore the guidelines and facets to Circle within our ongoing conversation of deepening our happiness in life. What if we lived our life in the ways of Circle? What peace would it build into our relationships? What new skills of listening and communicating would change the way we show up to relationships and even to conflict?

If you would like an incredible experience of Circle and Ceremony where we explore and welcome the Divine Feminine within each of us, please join our Peace Circle series beginning September 10^th, during which you will experience the power of dignity and Great Spirit to restore wholeness, inclusion and connection in your life. Ask me for more information!

Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world. We cannot cure the world of sorrows but we can choose to live in joy.  – Joseph Campbell

You have inoperable cancer. We can treat you with chemo and radiation. At best, we consider this palliative. These words seem to ricochet off the ceiling of the airplane and penetrate deeper and deeper. I attempt to read the Dalai Lama’s newest release. His usual comforting words seem to fall off the edge of the page. I hear the Boeing 767 engine rev. In five hours we will land in California. I remind myself to breathe deeply. Didn’t I read somewhere it is impossible to feel fear when one breathes deeply? Flying is a phobia of mine. Oh heck, let’s be honest. Dying is a phobia of mine.

I will be treated like I am going to live, I say to myself and anyone else who will listen. Thankfully, the Californian doctors are up for the task. Two months into treatment, I am more sick than I can imagine and looking for the ever elusive rainbow at the end of the tunnel. I have taken a great leap of faith and landed in the arms of trust with Reiki as my constant companion. Why is it so dark? I am grateful for the most basic things: sleep, dry toast and the strength to make it to the bathroom.

The soul who is my mate is worried. I can see it in his eyes. My hair is falling out in handfuls. Blessed with a resilient nature, I remind myself I live a charmed life. My daughters and my brothers are here for a short visit. The warmth of their love comforts me. I say goodnight and snuggle into bed. I hear the bedroom door open and close quietly. The three souls the Great Universe gifted me climb into bed with me and we giggle like school girls. ReJOYcing in each other’s presence, enJOYing the undeniable bond we share, we bask in the JOY of pure love. Here is your rainbow, Reiki whispers.

After four months of chemo and radiation treatment, I am going home tomorrow, cancer free. I glance at the keychain attached to my purse and smile. Purchased at a little shop in LAX for five dollars, “Peace love and California sun” has been my mantra to carry with me to every treatment. It has carried me through the darkest of days and the agony of treatment. Before cancer (B.C.), would I have felt the depth of JOY I now feel? I wonder. As every cancer patient will attest to, after diagnosis (A.D), life takes on new meaning. Time IS relevant.

Sitting at a beachside café, watching the California sun settle in behind Catalina Island, it is not difficult to let go of the day’s worries and be JOYfully lifted by Mother Nature’s colourful celebration of the day’s end. Her gift to us, it would seem, for a day well lived. Humbled by the splendour of her artistry, I bow my head and whisper to Reiki “Thank you for this day and this healing”.

~ Nancy Bennett

Thanks Nancy, for sharing this glimpse of your journey through treatment for cancer. Your story and life inspire and awe those of us who are blessed to know you, and surely those too who don’t.  ~ Lucy

This past week was a hot one – really just summer weather but a rarity this year, at least for such an expanse of days. I actually don’t mind this weather but I am grateful for an air-conditioned home.

To beat the heat, Rayna and I had our long morning walks at Snyder Flats in Bloomingdale every day (usually we only go a few times a week). For those of you unfamiliar to this dog mecca, it is a remediated gravel pit back the dirt road by Shirley Lynn’s office. Trails meander in and around several ponds with lots of space for everyone to roam alone or in small groups.

The ponds and shaded trails were beckoning us to enjoy them this week. And we were not alone – other humans and their dogs were also out and about in the heat, finding pleasure in a variety of things: long dips in the water; resting on a bench in the shade; games of chase in the long grass and into the water with other like-minded souls; shaking off a coat full of water in the midst of ‘dry’ [and maybe less-liberated] humans, re-saturating in the water to do it again; listening to the bustle of other creatures in the trees and grasses; discovering interesting scents in all kinds of nooks and crannies along the way; meeting up with dog or human friends, or making new ones. These are some of the simple joys I shared with Rayna this past week.

I feel privileged to be able to experience these joys with Rayna. Moving through the world with another species can be enlightening. It makes me more aware of the many joyful moments and experiences available to me as well – I just have to be present and willing to participate.

How often do we wish we had more time or opportunity for joy-filled experiences? We might mark our ‘planned’ happy times on our calendars [vacations, dates, sports events, parties, etc.] and eagerly anticipate the moment they arrive. Other times we are surprised by some unexpected happiness that occurs in our lives and consider ourselves lucky to have such good fortune. But really, joy is an ever-present reality – whether we are conscious of it or not. But by being conscious of it we can be grateful. And by being grateful, we can encourage and expect more happiness.

What Rayna showed me again last week is that life is full of joy and happiness – it is all-encompassing. If we live in expectation of joy and goodness, it will happen. Sure, there are times when something happens that knocks our confidence or our view of the world. They are challenging and can make us feel sad, or angry, or fearful or … . But these can be seen as just moments within a larger experience of joy and gratitude.

As a young dog (6 months), some might say Rayna is living in innocence and naivety. But perhaps this is really wisdom, and having an understanding of the true intended spirit of life. I encourage us all to look more to our children, our animals, our environment, to witness a better way of being – where the simple joys of life are enough.

As Shirley Lynn posted last week “go and <b>be with the joy</b> that is around” us all. Revel in it and be grateful for it.

posted by Lucy Martin

Last week my social media manager asked me to define joy since it has been my focus for July. In Chinese medicine, summer is the month of the heart and the natural emotion most connected with the heart in this system is joy. It is part of the rhythm of Nature. Her question made me realize I didn’t have a ready answer. After some thought and contemplation, I came up this understanding:

Joy, for me, is the experience where my mind is free and my heart feels its own passion …like a song for the soul that evokes enormous exhilaration and power to move mountains for a greater delight in all!

I realized that I cannot speak of joy outside of my own experience. It is not just a concept out there, a definition that is outside of my lived experience or wisdom gained.

As the weekend unfolded, a bigger picture of joy stirred my heart. I facilitated a Reiki Retreat last weekend and the magic of the cosmic energy that flowed through the group brought much peace and joy to me and the participants. Some finally found a touchstone of what is true for them in that place of joy and peace. What could not be overlooked, however, is this joy that people felt was born out of our individual awareness and experience of our own suffering; difficult and often painful life experiences where darkness overwhelmed.

Recently, a client sent me a documentary about horses and new ways that real master horse trainers are working with these magnificent beings. In the documentary, a photographer captured incredible shots of the pain horses experience with many of the techniques and equipment used today, explaining the real physiology of horses’ backs, noses and mouths. The contrast between these pain photos and the footage of these master horse trainers ‘inviting’ and ‘unifying in awareness’ with the horse was both agonizing and joyous. To watch the horse and master trainer be together in ways the mind is free and quiet – and where their passion exhilarated both into dance and free expression – stirred the passion in my own heart, my own song of the soul.

It was being present to the whole experience, being completely aware of the whole of the group’s experience at the Retreat that made real the joy for me.  It made me curious as to whether we can actually experience joy without the awareness that pain is simultaneously being experienced by its side. Perhaps that’s where joy’s power lies. It anchors alongside suffering or pain or difficulty so we can find our way out of this darkness. It serves as the balance and the freedom from this darkness.

However, too often we can’t see joy for the darkness. When I look back at some of the most difficult times of pain and inner suffering or darkness that I experienced in my awakening, healing and forgiving the past, I recognize what a gift my young niece and nephew were at the time. They brought such wondrous curiosity, natural joy and enthusiasm to life, to learning, to everything around them. I stepped away from my darkness of mind for a time and revelled in the joy of reading a children’s book with great pictures, playing Winnie the Pooh in the Hundred Acre Woods behind our house, or playing little games with our dog and cat friends. They were a saving grace to me …Universal Balance.

Today, I’m much less concerned with needing to escape pain or ‘suffering’ that I might have formulated in my own mind. What I am learning to do is go and be with the joy that is around me. Sometimes, it takes me longer to see it, but I can always find joy now.  And when I do find it, my mind becomes free and still for a moment and I can revel in the bliss of life. I really do want to dance and sing. Universal Balance happens and the pain shifts.

So I ask you: Where do you find joy? What is your experience of joy? Come and let’s be open to this journey this season, a journey of the heart.

At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.  Lao Tzu

 Last weekend I went to see Tommy, the musical currently playing at Stratford Festival. What an incredible show! The story takes us through the life of Tommy, a young boy who became deaf and mute as a result of childhood trauma. His spirit was trapped in the psychic splits this abuse caused and he was disconnected from the centre of his own core. The child actors did an amazing job of depicting the zombie existence of Tommy. The one place of his eventual engagement came as a ‘pinball wizard.’

As the story unfolds, Tommy grows older and undergoes lots of ‘medical and psychological’ testing to find out what the matter is. Nothing is truly revealed until a profound act by his mother finally breaks through to Tommy’s core. She shattered the illusion of who he thought he was. His freedom and happiness came in his discovery that his light was inside of him. He discovered himself and rejoiced in his ability to hear, speak and engage.

When the world tried to make him be their spiritual guru, he refused it and told them they already had what they needed inside of them. Go look for it there. Happiness comes first when we go inside and we experience the good fortune of loving ourselves. As Tommy discovered his centre and rejected the fame of being a spiritual guru to his fans and the masses, he realized he needed to go home and make peace with his family, those who had abused him and simply misunderstood the trauma he absorbed. And as the two ‘key skills’ that were offered last week, he faced the deep hurt within and sought peace with his family and his world, a vision that took him outside of himself.

The next morning Carlie and I had the pleasure of getting really close to a hawk who was  on the ground in the middle of the field. We stopped and acknowledged this incredible bird and wished it a wonderful day. To my happiness, the hawk invited me to remember the message of the birds this month about the mindset of happiness:

 “face your grief and hurt and seek peace with it, just as Tommy did. Then you will experience the good fortune of loving yourself and feeling happiness as a deeper state of living. Cultivate awareness so that you can see when ‘happiness’ arrives at your door in the ordinary moments of your life. And as you practise noticing happiness, you will feel deeper satisfaction. And as you express gratitude for this deeper satisfaction, you will open to the true self that holds the wisdom to live a fulfilled life.”

 The hawk then flew away and invited me to reflect on the happiness I felt at the show. Not only was I entertained with incredible music (it took me back to my teenage years of listening to ‘the Who’, a band I enjoyed listening and dancing to), I was called back to my centre to claim the good fortune of loving myself and realize that the inner peace I seek lies in my power to forgive those who have hurt me. Happiness, in this way, is an inside job to live. I leave you with this quote:

 Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.  Margaret Young

 Blessings of happy living as you step into Summer!

“It was the summer after my freshman year at Northern Michigan University in Marquette, Michigan. I packed my bags and shuffled off to Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming. For the next two months, I worked in the kitchen and the gift shop at Lake Yellowstone Hotel. On days off, I would fill a giant backpack with enough food, water, and clothes to last two days. New friends and I would backpack deep into Yellowstone’s grizzly bear inhabited forest and set up camp for the night (tents and camping supplies were carried on our backs too). These hikes were heart-poundingly difficult, and sometimes mosquito infested. But the beauty I beheld! I saw families of elk grazing or sometimes dashing off to a new location, giant moose resting under a shady bush, and a meteor shower unlike any I have ever witnessed. Every day that summer, I experienced a new wonder of nature. This convinced me that I wanted to have a connection with the force that created the beauty that I experienced. That was many years ago, and I still am compelled to have communion with the Creator of such wonder and magnificence.”   Barb

“The summer of 1996 was proving to be one of life altering experiences. Sitting on the beach listening to the waves was a welcome reprieve from recent days’ events. As the warmth of the sun’s rays subtly coaxed my tense body to relax, I listened as my 40-year old husband shared his recent cancer diagnosis with his long-time friend Trudy. Trudy, herself having just received a terminal cancer diagnosis, was unusually subdued as she listened intently.  As these two cherished people in my life shared their life defining experience since diagnosis, I found myself drifting to a difficult conversation with Danny earlier in the day. Believing “until death do us part” translated to 40 years from now; we never imagined that one of us might “part” in mid-life. I dug my heels into the wet, cool sand and savoured the sensation as the waves parted the sand for the sole of my feet to be embraced. This was not in our life plan. We were soul mates. How could one of us exist meaningfully without the other? I could feel my emotions of betrayal……anger……fear welling in my chest, as the reality of our circumstance sunk in. It is difficult to describe what followed. At this moment, Mother Nature with all Her grace and wisdom, using the waves and sand as Her medium, invited the overwhelm of these emotions to melt away into the wet sand through my feet. As awareness of this seemingly magical moment crept in, and a feeling of peace and harmony ensued, so did the realization I was not alone in this journey. I did not know where this new challenge would lead us, but I had the sense that no matter what happened, it would unfold as it should. Life happens, and when it becomes too much, you will find Danny and I sitting at the end of our dock. We invite Mother Nature to soothe our souls as we look out over the water enjoying the beauty of the moment. It is in the awareness of this moment, we know all is well. Life is good.”   Nancy

“When I was a kid, my family used to go camping together. We often went to a campground near Owen Sound and other places up north. For 2 weeks we would swim, play golf and baseball, barbecue, sleep in a tent trailer, do fire camps at night and see neat things in Nature. We often went with other families and so we would run around the camp with our friends. I loved it and still today when these old friends get together on rare occasions, we still laugh and recall the fun and games we played as children. As we moved into our teens, we still wanted these times of camping and the only difference was that the nights just got later around the campfire and the stories more ridiculous! To this day, I love the opportunity to let all the responsibilities of the rest of my life be put aside for a while, to sit down around the campfire and tell great stories that make us all laugh. Laughter is one of my soul medicines and camping reminds me to replenish it for my life!”   Shirley Lynn

“Memories are priceless, especially the fond ones. I would have to go back to the summer of 1996 which was the first year I met my husband. He introduced me to the beauty of Georgian Bay. We were boating and jet skiing over the weekend enjoying the beautiful weather. I hadn’t had that much fun in years. The waters did get a bit rough at times, pretty bouncy. At night we all gathered around the fire and told stories. What a night. So calm and peaceful. Sometimes now when I get stressed or need to find my place, I think of the views of Georgian Bay that weekend. Oh, and how tall and strong the trees are. No matter how rough the waters are, the water is still underneath. I will picture myself underneath the water and know to keep calm and strong, as the rough water passes. -Relax, Faith, Resilience, Gratitude, Appreciation, and Strength.  Life is good.”   Sandra

“Happy Summer Solstice! When Allie was a toddler she used to chase the seagulls hoping to catch one so she could fly with it. So hold on to the thought that we can all fly with the birds when we let our thoughts soar and our dreams be lifted skyward!”  JJ

“When I used to live in Glencoe, a small farming community south west of London, the summer nights were the best! Our main rule was to be home when the street lights turned on. We always followed that rule. We made it home, but we did not necessarily make it in the house. Our backyard was attached and open to three other backyards in a subdivision on the very outskirts of town.  Our neighbour allowed the kids in the neighbourhood to play on her huge metal monkey bars. My brother and I would be allowed to play on them until our parents finally called us in. Many kids often joined us in our nightly sessions. Some of the best stories were told and we had many laughs. In looking back, these nights provided a carefree and simplistic time and I will always treasure those memories. Going forward, I continue to take time to get away from it all and socialize, especially with family and friends as much as possible.”  Cindy

“It was the summer of 1970. I was 16 years old and had started on first part-time job. My new friends that I had met at work were heading to Sauble Beach for the weekend. I knew there was no way my dad would let me go. He didn’t allow me to do anything. So I lied to him. I ended up getting a ride up with friends and I hitchhiked home at the end of the weekend. This was a major step for me. It represented two things. The first was that I was totally dishonest with my parents and I was never dishonest – miss goody two-shoes. And surprisingly it didn’t bother me. The second part is that I hitchhiked with a guy all the way home. And surprisingly that didn’t bother me either. Instead I felt totally free. Totally liberated. Totally in control of my life. The only other time in my life that I felt that way was when I divorced. This is significant for me because I never did anything like it ever in my life again. I have never felt that sense of freedom, that sense of control again. Yet I know how it felt and I know that I have longed for that feeling. But it has become a small treasure that I hold in my heart for just me. To bring out at a moment when I feel the need. When I went home after this weekend I went back to my “miss goody two-shoes” life.  If you were to tell anyone in my family that I did this, they would never believe it. If I were asked to do it again right here, right now, I wouldn’t even hesitate! Freedom is a wonderful thing. This has been a good exercise for me. It was a time in my life that I treasure but surprisingly had forgotten about for this past while.  It has definitely got me thinking!!”   Karen

“It was only a few years ago. The first time I stayed at Wasaga Beach. Wolfgang and I had just enjoyed a wonderful dinner on the deck of the house we were renting. We saw a twinkle in a tree across the creek; it twinkled so brightly it caught our eye. As the sun was setting and evening was growing darker and darker, we saw a few more twinkling lights. The darker it grew, the more lights there were. Soon there were thousands of tiny twinkling lights. They looked like fairies gently flying and swaying across the creek and right up to where we were standing. We did not know what it was we were experiencing until the following day. We do know we had an amazing sense of peace and excitement at the same time. It was truly beautiful and we did not want to leave the deck and go into the house. Later that same evening, we heard the sound of something crossing the creek, sloshing in the water and stamping up to the backyard of the house. We got the camera, and caught photos of a doe deer and her two young fawns. They were just grazing on the grass. Quite content. We know the deer now, and feed them corn every evening, as we go back to the same house each July. The first time we saw and heard them was exciting and filled me with a sense of awe. They are majestic, yet playful. Wary and somewhat skittish, but curious about us, and still strong and graceful, able to bound across the large lot and creek into the woods in a flash. They teach you that you can be strong and gentle together. We later found out that the twinkling fairy lights were fireflies and they were in abundance that year. It was such a beautiful, exhilarating experience. It drew us closer and it gave us a profound appreciation and awe of nature. Our best holidays are always those spent embracing what nature has to show us.”   Judy

“I immediately thought of my best friend, Tess, and being at her cottage as a youngster. There were many kids on Smirle Street, but Tess and I were really close. Her parents would take me to their cottage every summer until I left Ottawa at age 9. The memory is of swimming in the beautiful lake, with water so clean. We also would canoe around and check out different cottages or little islands. Tess’ grandfather built one cottage and then a few years later bought a new cottage beside the old one. The old cottage had secret pathways through it – one upstairs and one that went from upstairs to downstairs. I loved that place! Across the gravel road there was a pond that would be FULL of tadpoles, and we would go with a glass jar and scoop some up and check the different ones out: some tiny with tails, and some big starting to develop legs. So cool. Good memories.”   Sam

“The summer of 1981 was a memorable one for me. I just finished high school and was looking for adventure. I found it in the form of biking across Canada with 21 others from various parts of Canada and the US. We started in the Pacific Ocean and ended 2 months later in the Atlantic. I learned a lot that summer and I won’t bore you with the long version about all our trials and tribulations, joys and triumphs – can you say character-building? What stands out for me even today is the value of community in supporting each other through the highs and lows of our life journey – each of us could probably still recall a time on that trip when we didn’t think we could go on but someone said or did something that gave us the necessary support to keep moving forward. A simple squirt of water did the trip sometimes. Other times an imaginary tow line pulled someone up yet another mountain. I like to believe that I have carried this lesson forward in my life. I want to remember and act on the knowledge that reaching out and offering help and support to someone (whether in big or small ways) can have a positive impact on that person, and maybe me too. As Red Green used to say, “…we’re all in this together”. Some of you who know me may think – “I didn’t know she liked to bike”. And you’re right. I don’t. Never really did. I’ve rarely been on a bike since. But it still was the ride of a lifetime. Kind of a coming-of-age adventure that will stay with me forever.”   Lucy

Thanks to everyone who shared their best summer holiday memories along with the impact they had on who you are today. Congratulations to Cindy who is the winner of our random draw for a one-of-a kind Beat the Heat of Summer Gift Basket.

Yesterday I realized just how many happy moments are available to me in the course of one day. I had a really good night’s sleep. Carlie and I had a wonderful 15 minute walk today – she is post-surgery so it brought tremendous happiness to both of us to be able to get out and sniff ‘new’ things. We celebrated my mother’s birthday and we connected with family and friends over dinner. We enjoyed hearing my nephew sing via computer. Moments of joy. And that is what the birds sang to me: happiness is moments of joy, the good fortune of loving myself.

These little moments of joy are gifts when they come to us in our day. They lift our mood, celebrate our relationships and bring joy to our real existence. At the same time, we need to cultivate awareness so we recognize when these little moments present themselves to us, face to face, heart to heart. That may sound simple enough and easily done, yet it can be difficult to sustain when we face challenges and disappointments.

Last week, Lucy shared her insight of how we can spread happiness; cultivate more of it in our environment by responding and encouraging more of what makes others happy. We are not asked here to disregard loving ourselves or to neglect the boundaries and self care that invites happiness in us. Rather, I believe, the expansiveness that Lucy was talking about comes out of having a deeper sense of meaning in life.

As is expressed in my mission, ‘wisdom’s way to peace’, I experience profound meaning in my life by helping others make peace with themselves, their families, their environment, their Higher Power and Presence, with their lives and so forth by connecting them with their own inner wisdom. We all have conflicts of some sort, hidden and conscious. Developing skills to cultivate an attitude of happiness and expanding our awareness to embrace the moments of joy as they arise are powerful antidotes to the conflicts that so often take up space in our mind and wind tight in the connective tissue in our bodies.

As we build skills to be happy in our attitude, we need to practise these skills to sustain this attitude over the long haul. As these moments get stronger and more frequent, we evolve into deeper states of satisfaction. Deeper states of satisfaction open the door to experience deeper levels of fulfilment. Feeling fulfilled is reserved for those moments and times and continuum of experience that connects us to our purpose in life, to that which gives us a meaningful sense of existence.

So how do we move from moments of joy to living a fulfilled life where happiness is not just about an emotional feeling, but rather an existential sense of meaning and purpose that contributes to the larger good?

I will share two key ‘skills’ to sustain inner happiness leading to fulfilment for you to contemplate and test. Please bring your own insights to this conversation.

(Remember, the birds asked me to go and ponder their wisdom: So to my surprise, the robin’s message tells me that being happy means that there is good fortune in loving myself. Good fortune comes when I appreciate what I have; it comes when I open to the moments of joy as I share my gifts for the greater good. I will be ‘lucky’ when I find joy in my place in the world. The Welsh understood this kind of attitude as being wise.)

1. What is it you are seeking to accomplish that is bigger than you? If you don’t have anything, then you must find something or happiness will be fleeting and inner fulfilment will always remain elusive.
2. What still hurts? Unresolved hurt can turn into resentment, depression, anger, despair and a gripping sense of alienation from being loved and belonging. It trips us up at the most inopportune times when a path to happiness opens up.

When you are honest with yourself and listen with heart to the answers that arise from deep within your core to these questions, what path to happiness becomes revealed? Is it what you imagined? What is one first step you need to take to bring momentum and new life to this path of something bigger than you and/or beginning to heal that inner hurt blocking the way? Let’s get started.

 Namaste.

Last week Rayna and I (Lucy) moved into the next phase of our training (puppy classes are now complete). One of the skills required in the first level is for me to be able to prompt her to wag her tail. Huh? [The premise is that it shows social engagement, specifically with me]. Sounds easy enough except that Rayna doesn’t wag her tail as readily as some other dogs do. This has made me consider what a wagging tail means.

Without going into all the nuances of tail wags, I am limiting a wagging tail here to mean what we understand as the “I’m happy to see you” wag. I began to pay close attention to when Rayna wags her tail – I learned that she wags her tail when greeting a new person or animal into her environment, particularly if she is feeling comfortable and fairly confident. A novel stimulus is likely to invoke a wag from Rayna.

As I stated above, we presume a wagging tail to mean the dog is happy to see us. They are outwardly expressing their happiness in that moment. But does that mean the dog is a ‘happy’ dog? Are ‘tail-waggers’ happier dogs? If a dog doesn’t wag its tail as readily, is it less happy? Specifically, is Rayna unhappy if she doesn’t wag her tail as readily someone like Carlie?

More observation and reflection revealed that tail wagging is simply one outward expression of how the dog is feeling at that moment – “I’m SO HAPPY to see you!” There could also be sparkling eyes, a lolling grin, jumping and bouncing around, etc. All are momentary outward expressions of an internal state of being, in this case, happiness.

One trainer suggested that if I want Rayna to wag her tail more, I need to mark the behavior and reward her for doing it – this will increase the behaviour. Interesting! I can reinforce and increase someone else’s expression of happiness simply by rewarding them in a meaningful (to them) way. I have the power to increase happiness around me by responding and encouraging more of it in others.

This confirms for me that happiness is expansive – we really can make more of it if we intentionally set out to do so. Being happy and expressing it freely has a positive effect on those around you. At some point all of these outward expressions of happiness will shift the internal state of being to match the environment. Who doesn’t feel uplifted and loved with a greeting that says “I’m SO HAPPY to see you!”? And who can resist responding with our own variation of “I’m SO HAPPY to see you too”?

Take a few moments to consider your own life. Are you happy? How do you express it? Do you reinforce happiness in others? How? Do you encourage it in yourself?

Back to Rayna. I feel fairly confident that overall she is a happy dog (which makes me happy too). I have noticed that Rayna demonstrates her happiness in multiple ways (some more endearing than others). Sometimes that includes wagging her tail. Now I just have to get her to do it on cue…

Happiness … pass it on!

submitted by Lucy Martin